According to blogger, Carolyn Steber, who researched financial abuse in her article published on Bustle, all couples have disagreements about money at some point. However, she says that “if your partner is controlling when it comes to spending, discourages you from earning more money, or has begun controlling all the income in your relationship, it may be a sign of financial abuse.”
If the couple can talk about and work on the issue, and come to a resolution, then it is not financial abuse. Steber says, it’s important to pay close attention to the signs, “because financial abuse is often symptomatic of other types of abuse, such as emotional and verbal.”
Below we’ve listed our top four signs of financial abuse based on Steber’s article.
- Your partner controls all your income
This is when your salary is paid into your partner’s account. This is unhealthy, because your partner is in control of making all the financial decisions, leaving your partner financially independent and you dependent on your partner. This leaves the relationship unbalanced, and is certainly financial abuse.
- Your partner gives you an allowance
If your partner controls all the money, and you only receive an allowance, and you must prove how you spent your allowance, or motivate for additional funds then you are financially abused. No one in a relationship should have this kind of decision-making power. All people in relationships should retain independence.
- You are kept in the dark
If your partner keeps you in the dark about your “bills, credit cards, and debts, [your] financially abusive partner may intentionally keep you in the dark as a form of control.” Knowing your financial situation and being in control of managing it, is important to be independent. If you are kept in the dark about this, this leads to financial concerns which could lead to additional worries and stresses in other areas of your life.
- Your partner often plays games
The abuser wants to have all the control in the relationship and plays the gatekeeper of all the money. Their only concern is their comfort, and they will have you jumping through hoops to get access to the money. The aim is to maintain control in the relationship with their own needs and comfort receiving priority in the relationship.
For more information on financial abuse, read the full article here.
